The Horn Section Never Gets Any Action!

"Frontmen score all the hot chicks. After them it's the guitar players, then the bassists, then us - the drummers (forget the horn section, they are not cool). We never get the girl and always have the slimmest pickin's. For one thing, we're behind the big drum set, way in the back of the stage. And then when we leave the stage we're the sweatiest and smelliest, and you really don't want to use the showers backstage. Plus, we're pretty disheveled-looking - our hair's messed up and gross. But we're the atheletes of the band and the ones in the best shape, because we're working the hardest every night. I mean, you're girls - who would you go for?"

return to Hawkins' Poor Brain